5 Types of Tourists You’ll Meet on the Trail (And Would Prefer to Avoid)

The Tatras in summer are not only mountains. They are also a fascinating study in sociology. When people from all over Poland meet—each with a different level of preparation, fitness, and imagination—the trail turns into an explosive mix.

Most of the people in the mountains are fantastic, kind walkers. But there are also a few types who can ruin the most beautiful sunset on Hala Gąsienicowa. See if you haven’t accidentally passed one of them on your way to the summit.

1. The Trail DJ (The Guy With a Speaker)

This phenomenon arrived in the Tatras with the era of cheap Bluetooth speakers. The Trail DJ believes the sound of wind in the mountain pine and birdsong is absolutely unbearable. So he decided to make the whole Kościeliska Valley happy with his latest mix of rap, techno, or disco-polo.

• Where you’ll spot him: Most often on the asphalt road to Morskie Oko, but they “mutate” and make it higher and higher (they’ve even been seen under Zawrat).
• How to react: Politely, but firmly, remind him that we’re in a National Park. Alternatively—overtake him at a fast pace (though their music carries for a whole kilometre).

2. The Infernal Sprinter (The “I’ll Get You Lost” Guy)

You’ll recognize him because he’s always running. No, he’s not trail running. He’s simply “conquering.” He pants like a locomotive, overtakes everyone off the trail (destroying vegetation), bumps people on the chains at Giewont and at every step loudly comments on how slowly everyone else is walking. Halfway up towards Czerwone Wierchy, it often ends with a spectacular “power cut” (a.k.a. a heart attack in the eyes) and a slow zombie shuffle.

• Rule: In the mountains, there are no medals for the fastest crossing time. If you’re walking uphill, you have priority over someone going downhill—remind the Sprinter of that the moment he tries to ram you.

3. The Suffering Parent (“Walk On and Don’t Complain!”)

Watching this is a pain for the heart. Instead of choosing for their little one Strążyska Valley—with spotting frogs and tossing little stones into the water—the Suffering Parent drags a crying five-year-old up to Kozi Wierch.

The child cries, sits down on a stone, and above them stands the father with the chant: “What kind of wimp are you—only one more hour!” We guarantee that once back home, this child will hate the Tatras for the rest of their life.

• Tip from our blog: Read How to take children into the mountains (and not go crazy).

4. Tatras Elites (The “And You Only in the Valleys?” Guy)

You meet him in a mountain hut. You’re drinking tea and he sits next to you, immediately analyzing your gear. If you don’t have 1,500 zł boots and a backpack with a famous brand logo, he starts looking down on you.

Talking to him is like an auction. You say you were on Grzes? He says he was on Gerlach in winter—without oxygen canisters. You say Orla Perć is a challenge? He ran it before breakfast.

• Our advice: Nod, say “respect,” and enjoy your own achievements. The mountains are for everyone—whether you’re conquering K2, or just strolling around Smreczyński Pond.

5. The Ecology Master (The Trash-Disguiser)

He knows you’re not supposed to litter. After all, he’s not an uncivilized brute! That’s why he carefully hides empty beer cans, candy wrappers, and wet wipes under a big stone—or behind the mountain pine. “What you can’t see doesn’t exist.”

Unfortunately, bears and foxes have absolute noses. They’ll dig up that trash, eat the leftovers (including plastic), and most likely pay for it with their lives.

• TPN rule: If you carried full stuff, you can—and should—carry empty stuff. Your backpack will be lighter on the way back.

The mountains verify your character faster than any other test. Let’s be kind to each other on the trail, make room for better hikers, help those who are less confident—and yes, wear headphones. See you on the trail!